Friday, May 4, 2012

A Visit With My Dad

Ever feel like life is rumbling forward faster than you can keep up?  Like everything you want to do is going on without you while you drown in the the stuff you need to do?  Well, that's where I have been lately.  Sinking into Must-Do, Need-To-Do oblivion.  It's times like these that I really, honestly, more than anything, just wish I had a wise dad to go sit with on a big ol' porch, drink a huge cup of rich coffee, and have him tell me it's worth it.  He knows it's worth it, because he was there once, too.  I've been feeling like that a lot lately.  Don't mind if I say it, but it kind of sucks not having it.  And I know in my heart that my Heavenly, Father God wants that same company with me, but I like to throw myself a little pitty party once in a while and whine a little.  "I know you love me, God.  I know you're all the father I need.  But the truth is, I just want that Daddy wisdom sometimes.  And you're just not doing it for me!"  Shameful, right?!

So, as you may know, I'm in school right now.  My brain is moving ninety to nothing most of the time (and the nothing is the part I'm worried about!), but I am wrapping up my last couple of classes for the semester so I feel a little bit of rest coming on.  If you are anything like me (and women, you can probably relate best), when you're all wound up, usually you're doing just fine, but when things start to slow and settle, that's when the emotional release comes on.  You know what I mean?  You know what I mean...and the waterworks turn on! It's weird how that happens...you would expect that when stress is the highest, that's when you'd lose it.  But no, it's in that moment that you realize you've gotten to the clearing that all that pent-up emotion comes flooding out.  That's how it was for me this morning.  I have been having that little pitty party I was telling you about earlier with the Lord the last couple of weeks.  But today, oh today was that day.  I made a big cup of Starbucks Verona, sat down in my big, brown armchair, opened up the Word, and there was my my Dad.  Just when I needed Him the most, He was there.  Here's what He said:

    When I was a son with my father,
        tender, the only one in the sight of my mother,
    he taught me and said to me,
    “Let your heart hold fast my words;
        keep my commandments, and live.
    Get wisdom; get insight;
        do not forget, and do not turn away from the words of my mouth.
    Do not forsake her, and she will keep you;
        love her, and she will guard you.
    The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom,
        and whatever you get, get insight.
    Prize her highly, and she will exalt you;
        she will honor you if you embrace her.
    She will place on your head a graceful garland;
        she will bestow on you a beautiful crown.”

(Proverbs 4:3-9 ESV)

My Dad's really poetic, right?!  Well, after that little chat, I had myself a good cry.  The wisdom of generations, passed down from father, to son, from father, to son, from Father, to me.  Just what I needed.  The exact Words that I was longing to hear, and my Father poured them into me as generously as I had poured that coffee!  All this hard work...all these late nights...all this wrestling with purpose, and giftedness, and calling...it's the pursuit of wisdom, and it's worthy.  I like how the NIV (1984) says verse 7, "Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding."  It can't get any clearer than that! 


So what about you?  Is there something your heart is aching to hear?  Is there a moment of clarity you are seeking or a pat on the back or a cool drink of water to keep running?  When was the last time you had coffee with your Dad and let Him pass on His Wisdom?  It's great if we have an earthly dad we can call upon, but we're not alone if we don't.  Care to share a time when your Father God met with you in a special way?